No matter how you are managing today, it's ok

When I think back to the past two years I am blown away by all the things we have learned. Time is a funny thing, as you get older it goes fast and slow at the same time.

When I think back to chunks of time it seems like our kids went from little tiny babies to large and in charge toddlers fast. Our son these days seems more and more like he has left that toddler stage in the dust and is now a little boy.

If I examine things closely, I know I have dramatically changed. My tolerance has grown in many ways, with greater compassion and understanding. My tolerance has also shortened in a lot of ways.

With the need for advocacy comes a need for swift movement. I have cried, shouted, and researched late into the night. With a sword of knowledge come strength and confidence.

I have also found that my relationships, in general, have shifted, some becoming stronger and closer, and others more distant. I have tried to respect the change, learn the hard lessons, and give myself time to process all that is changing around me. Our world as a whole really has taken a dramatic shift.

We all have found ourselves in pockets of loneliness, saying goodbye to what we once knew, and shifting our perspectives on the world in general. I think some days it is easy to find yourself in this space and others it feels like climbing into a dark hole.

What I have learned is that we are always changing. That your perspective on life is your greatest strength. If you can find time to take a small step back to see how far you have come, today might feel a little less lonely.

I have also learned one of the most important things to do is spend your time building relationships and remember to continue to make a space for yourself. To understand that today isn’t forever and the future isn’t guaranteed.

We can build our own story page by page and it is our choice on how we write it. There are many things we can’t control, something that will continue to be a lifelong struggle for me to understand, but we can control our perspective on this life.

I have also learned that it is ok to sit in your feeling if they are the dark ones but try not to stay there too long. We can’t feel absolute joy without also understanding pain. Being a caregiver, mother, advocate, employee, friend, wife and so much more takes balance.

Sometimes you can’t help if the scale is tipped too far in one direction. And no matter how you are managing today, it is ok.